#1
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Sorry for only ever posting on here when things are tough Sad but I know lots of you here will understand. Things are really getting me down atm, again its all down to my bloody neighbours. Some of you will know the trouble I have had in the past with them regarding my eldest son Noah (ASD) and his OCD with throwing. Summer is fast approachong and the warm spell we have had latley has of course meant the Children wanting to be outside. This had led to Noah's "throwing" to rear its head again and I cant cope with the way I feel knowing that the are documenting EVERY object that ends up in their garden. I do everyting I can to make sure there isnt stuff lying around, BUT as those of you with Autistic children will know they are resourcefull to say the least!!
But seriously its no joking matter now, I feel as though my every move is being watched, esp now they have installed camera's to the front and rear of the house and logged a complaint with the HO (Housing association properties) I have a Parent Support Worker who has been fantastic and it truley disgusted that they just "Dont Get It" They dont seem to have any compassion or understanding out of all my neighbours they make me feel so rubbish.
I have managed to talk the HO into allowing me to put up some 6ft fencing in the key focus area but only on the stipulation that I have to go and explain to them what I am doing. They are NOT the most approachable family (even the schools head teacher agree's) So Im going to write a note instead!
Im basically worried about the trouble they could possibley cause me, to my tenancy etc
Even the HO didnt seem to understand the he doesnt do it to be malicious. Apparently they (neighbours) are concernd and seen any object as a potential "missile, No more so I say than their sons bloody football that I am forever retrieving/returning. Oh and I pretty much never see the items that he throws again as they seem to like to keep them to show the HO.

By the way this is the same neighbour that I have had to report to the police and the NSPCC due to his violent behaviour towards his OWN children. I also know the school have begun their own inquiry due to concerns seen in school. He beats them so hard I can hear it, uses such foul language, called his own son a retard! What chance of getting him to understand Noah's condition do I have.
All this on top of being a single mum to Noah and his sister and brother, Im at breaking point. I have become reclusive and withdrawn from everything
So sorry this is so long, I just typed as I thought xXx Thanks for reading xXx

(on a slightly more positive note Noah has been awarded the mobility element to his DLA)
Heart Single Mummy to Noah (5) ASD, Abbigail (4) and Oliver (2) Heart
#2
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O gosh I am really sorry to hear of your situation. I really don't know what to say....I don't think there is much help for your neighbour if has that disgusting behaviour towards his own children!!! How awful. I also think a note would be better than going around and trying to talk to him!

Have you tried a social story to try and help your little one about throwing the toys? With our little girl social stories seem to work well but all children with ASD are different and respond to different things. Big hugs. X
Things can be hard on occasions but well worth it!Heart
#3
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Hi

How awful, I would try sending a note/letter with a cc to housing association and anyone elses that they have complained to. I would also send it recorded/signed delivery for peace of mind. Housing association should at least try and see your side aswell. Can your parent support worker try and find some funding for the extra fencing ...maybe get HA to put it up and save you some cash?. Good luck with it.
#4
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God what crap neighbours!!! I know this suggestion seems a bit dramatic but do you know if you have a local PCSO (Police Community Support Officer)? You could ask them to visit you (in plainclothes) so that you could let them meet your son and explain your situation and that you feel threatened by your neighbours attitude towards your children. You can ask them not to visit your neighbours but just tell them you needed to talk to them in confidence. They shouldn't do anything you don't want them too.

I know it's rubbish thinking that the police will then have your address and info about your family but it's best you get in first with them then when/if your neighbour decides to do something ridiculous at least the local police are aware of it.

Also I would tell your Health Visitor, if you have one. There's no way you should feel that your children can't enjoy being outside in the nice weather.
#5
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I was horrifies to hear about your neighbour's actions.

I had thought about a toy I saw in a shop recently. It was a type of bean bag and target game. I thought that maybe if your son would play with something like this it may encourage him to throw things in a more controlled way. You could face the target away from your neighbour and give your son lots of praise if he aims at the target. I know my son responds well to praise, so he might want to just keep throwing things at the target.

Don't know if this helps, hope things work out for you
Best wishes
Bev


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