#1
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Hello all im having trouble getting help for my son he is 6 and have been told the doctors suspect he has autism/aspergers i have recently split from his mother and at the moment he is living with me 7 days a week but with the holidays im struggling to get help i work full time and am relying on my parents who also work to help his mother says she cant cope with him and our 2 other children due to his violent behaviour but he is an angel for me i have a disciplinary hearing at work due to all the time off and low productivity i dont want to have to give up work ive worked from the day i left school but if its the only way i can care for my son then so be it id do it in a heartbeat just wondered if anyone knew of help with childcare etc sorry for rambling hope to hear from people soon
#2
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(08-02-2010, 10:05 AM)marcus83 Wrote: Hello all im having trouble getting help for my son he is 6 and have been told the doctors suspect he has autism/aspergers i have recently split from his mother and at the moment he is living with me 7 days a week but with the holidays im struggling to get help i work full time and am relying on my parents who also work to help his mother says she cant cope with him and our 2 other children due to his violent behaviour but he is an angel for me i have a disciplinary hearing at work due to all the time off and low productivity i dont want to have to give up work ive worked from the day i left school but if its the only way i can care for my son then so be it id do it in a heartbeat just wondered if anyone knew of help with childcare etc sorry for rambling hope to hear from people soon
Hello Marcus,
Have you requested flexible working hours as this may take some of the strain off you.

You must:

•be an employee, but not an agency worker or in the armed forces
•have worked for your employer for 26 weeks' continuously before applying
•not have made another application to work flexibly under the right during the past 12 months
You will then have the statutory right to ask if you:

•have or expect to have parental responsibility of a child aged 16 or under or a disabled child under 18 who receives Disability Living Allowance (DLA)
•are the parent/guardian/special guardian/foster parent/private foster carer or as the holder of a residence order or the spouse, partner or civil partner of one of these and are applying to care for the child
•are a carer who cares, or expects to be caring, for an adult who is a spouse, partner, civil partner or relative; or who although not related to you, lives at the same address as you

Under the law your employer must seriously consider any application you make, and only reject it if there are good business reasons for doing so. You have the right to ask for flexible working - not the right to have it.

Employees who do not have the legal right to request flexible working are, of course, free to ask their employer if they can work flexibly. Many employers are willing to consider such requests.

How far are you down the path of getting a diagnosis at the moment?
Have they been assessed yet and what are the schools saying in terms of behaviour?

Also you mention that you are working are you in receipt of tax credits as they cover 80% of childcare costs.
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#3
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first of all thanks for getting back to me as far as im aware his mother is claiming tax credits for him and i was told if i claimed for him hers would go down she is not particularly approachable about this which is causing friction i have been speaking to local authorities about respite care or carers that would come and look after him while im at work but if im honest i think im dreaming i have tried applying online for DLA but i cant even log on to their stupid gateway it seems theres a roadblock at every turn not to mention these things take time
#4
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(08-02-2010, 01:14 PM)marcus83 Wrote: first of all thanks for getting back to me as far as im aware his mother is claiming tax credits for him and i was told if i claimed for him hers would go down she is not particularly approachable about this which is causing friction i have been speaking to local authorities about respite care or carers that would come and look after him while im at work but if im honest i think im dreaming i have tried applying online for DLA but i cant even log on to their stupid gateway it seems theres a roadblock at every turn not to mention these things take time

The gateway system requires a password but it does generate one online usually Blush

In terms of tax credits you are looking after your son so why are you not getting it?
Is the arrangement permnant or just holidays?
Even if its just holidays then you should get this still as your looking after him Huh
If she is claiming tax credits then you can also claim for childcare which should help with things.

Respite is an option but is it a problem solver long term?
Also in regards to DLA you say that he is suspected as having ASD but is an angel for you what needs does he have when he is with you?
Looking for sensory toys at affordable prices then look no further

Sensory toys for children with special needs CLICK HERE
#5
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hello, read your post earlier but this is the 1st chance i've had to reply.
1st thing i would say just from reading your post is if you are your sons full time carer and he lives with you, you should be the one claiming the tax credits and recieving the child benefit for him. if the mother is and he doesn't live her then to an extent it amounts to fraud. sorry to say that but it's the way the inland revenue would see it. the money is essentially for his upbringing and the person caring for him should recieve it . i totally appreciate that it is a difficult subject to approach and i don't know your circumstances but it's maybe a difficult conversation you shouold consider having.
i would advise calling DLA for an application, they will backdate any payments to the date you call them so it will give you plenty of time to fill out the form. also going back to tax credits if you are awarded tax credits then you can get extra depending on what level of DLA you get. don't worry about not having a formal diagnoses for your son the form mainly looks at how your child need differ to that of a 'normal' (don't like using that word but .....).
third bit of advice is basically what daniel has written but also speak to your employers about your situation but also speak to them about flexiable working, alot of work places will allow you term time only work. again another reason to get the tax credits sorted as this would go up depending on your earnings and also they could help with childcare costs
lastly get in touch with somewhere like barnado's as they might be able to give you advice on childcare or after school clubs. if not barnado's look in the yellow pages for any local carers charities. it might be a case of phoning around but hopefully speaking to someone they might be able to give you extra advice on services in your area


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